Bizzare and Freak Mobile/Celll Phone Accidents (News, Report, Urban Legend)

There have been some bizarre cell phone accidents in the news of late:

* In January 2004, a Malaysian man who napped on his bed while his cell recharged beside him was reportedly scalded across his buttocks by the remnants of the phone's battery as the unit exploded. The 40-year-old electrician had put a new battery into his cell the week before.

* In February 2004, Asia Pulse reported that the SV-130 phone belonging to a 54-year-old South Korean woman exploded, setting her bed on fire. According to their account, the cell was not being used at the time, and its battery was disconnected. Fortunately, the woman was sleeping in another room at the time her phone went ka-bang.

* In March 2004, a welder in Thailand was said to have suffered a severe electric shock when his cell phone exploded from having been brought into too close proximity to a high-voltage pole. The victim's injuries were severe enough to necessitate his leg's being amputated.

* In September 2004, a report out of southern Vietnam stated that a two-year-old Siemens C45 left charging for 30 minutes had exploded, slightly injuring a bystander.

Worldwide, a number of cells exploded in 2003, a great many of them Nokia phones. According to Nokia, third-party or counterfeit batteries were to blame: in each and every exploding phone case it investigated, the battery in question proved not to be original to the unit and not to have included industry-standard safety measures. It also found the vast majority of short circuits that led to these explosions were caused by the units' having undergone traumatic events (such as being dropped) which jeopardized the integrity of poorly-manufactured batteries.

If the Shoe Fits . . ."Just Do it", Nike, Urban Legeng, Folklore

Claim: The Samburu tribesman appearing in a Nike commercial was supposed to say the equivalent of "Just Do It" in his native language, but he said something entirely different instead.
Status: True.

Origins: Everyone loves a good tale of corporate mayhem. Here's a short version of this 1989 news story:
Nike has a television commercial for hiking shoes that was shot in Kenya using Samburu tribesmen.

The camera closes in on the one tribesman who speaks, in native Maa. As he speaks, the Nike slogan "Just do it" appears on the screen.

Lee Cronk, an anthropologist at the University of Cincinnati, says the Kenyan is really saying, "I don't want these. Give me big shoes."

Says Nike's Elizabeth Dolan, "We thought nobody in America would know what he said."
Business blunders delight us in that we like to see the powerful with a bit of egg on their faces. The facts of this story aren't in dispute — there was such a commercial, it was shot in Kenya, and over a subtitle of "Just Do It" the tribesman said "I don't want these. Give me big shoes" in his native Maa. But why did this happen? And was Nike aware of what the man was really saying, or had they been caught flatfooted?

Nike's explanations were contradictory:
Nike spokeswoman Liz Dolan said Cronk is correct. "We knew what he was saying," Dolan said. "It was our line."

She said Nike originally intended to have the commercial end with a joke line in which the tribesman complained that Nike sent him the wrong size. But the editors decided the simple Nike slogan worked better. "It was so lovely and beautiful, we dropped the joke," she said.

Dolan also said the tribesman repeated a phrase that is the Maa equivalent of "Just do it," but the video of the other phrase worked better. "The Maa version of 'Just Do it' was too lengthy" for a 30-second spot, she said.
and Nike contends that an earlier script called for the tribesman's ironic comment, but the company decided in the end to stick with its slogan in the subtitle. So far so good — at this point it sounds like Nike changed the script at the last second, that they knew what the fellow was saying but went with it anyway because this particular string of Maa sounded better to North American ears than an accurate one would have. Bit brainless of them not to realize that someone in the viewing audience was bound to know enough Maa to get the joke, but still a far cry from unintentionally ending up the goat in this story.

Another explanation was surfacing, however:
An embarrassed Nike spokesman admits the film crew had to improvise after having difficulty in obtaining a Maa version of the slogan. "We never really knew what the tribesmen were saying," concedes director Hannah Hempstead.
All spin doctoring attempts aside, I'm inclined to believe the director. Adding to her credibility is this snippet from a 1990 magazine article:
The Samburu tribe was Hempstead's cast for the :30 Nike spot. The Samburu speak the Mah language, and the crew's translator spoke Swahili. This caused a minor communication glitch that was partially remedied by pointing to pictures in a book on the Masai tribe to show the cast what was needed on film.

True or not, tales of inappropriate foreign phrases sneaked into films have been around for many years, as evidenced by this anecdote from the pen of M*A*S*H star Jamie Farr:
I remembered one Saturday night back at the Rivoli in Toledo. Everyone in the neighborhood (including most of the Arab-American community in Toledo) had turned out to see "Sirocco" with Humphrey Bogart [1951], set somewhere in North Africa. There was one scene in a crowded bazaar. As Bogart passed through, and the scene began to fade, one Arab voice rang out, "Ya hallah deen bayak!" That almost brought the house down. "What?" The non-Arabs in the house wanted to know: "What is everybody laughing about?" My buddy, Gregory Morris, decided he would translate . . . "That means, 'Goddamn your father.'"

Okay, so what's the international sign for "Just do it"?

This is True! (Auckland, New Zealand, "David Lim", davidlim)

A High Caliber of Citizens

University of Chicago, Ill., economist John Lott studied crime statistics in states that have “relaxed” laws about carrying guns. He found that the crime rates in “right to carry” states went down, sometimes way down, after passing legislation allowing responsible adults to carry guns. Murders fell an average of 8 percent, rapes 5 percent and aggravated assaults 7 percent, while at the same time in the U.S. as a whole murders went up 24 percent, rapes went up 71 percent, and assaults went up more than 100 percent. And in those states, the death rate in mass public shootings — such as a crazed gunman opening fire in a crowded restaurant — dropped 69 percent, while deaths from accidental shootings increased by only about one per year. Hardly a gun freak, Lott has never been a member of the National Rifle Association and didn’t even own a gun when he started his study. But once he saw how clearly the statistics were turning out, he bought one. (Time) ...“An armed society is a polite society." —Robert A. Heinlein (1907-1988), American writer.

Newspeak
Vice President Al Gore called a press conference to give an award to the Occupational Safety and Health Administration. He presented the first Plain Language (“No Gobbledygook”) Award to OSHA for rewriting a rule relating to “dipping tanks”. The rule previously took two paragraphs totaling 79 words and cited 15 examples. The new award-winning language took seven paragraphs totaling 61 words, and included no examples. (Reuters)

Stick to Gambling
Charles Hales said he went to the restroom at the Silver Star Casino in Philadelphia, Pa., three years ago. Somehow, he got stuck to the toilet seat. Casino security had to bring him to a back room to pry the seat off. That was too much for Hales. “Walking down the aisle with a security guard and waddling like a duck was a little more than I could handle,” he says, so he has filed a $50,000 lawsuit against the casino, claiming that the seat must have been smeared with glue. The casino says no glue was found on the seat, and they provided paper seat covers in any case. (AP)

Artistic Salesman Wanted
A survey by Redbook magazine discovered “who makes the best husband by profession.” The winners are artists, truck drivers and mechanics. Worst were doctors and computer specialists. Artists got a 100 percent score for “taking their time” at foreplay, with 13 percent even taking too much time. However, with quality, quantity suffers: 40 percent of the artists manage to perform only once per week, while salesmen are tops, averaging sex once per day. But there’s that quality versus quantity problem: 25 percent of salesmen’s wives say “it’s over in a flash.” (Reuters)

Nine out of Ten Would be Adequate
Researchers at Alabama’s Auburn University say they have determined what men want in the “ideal woman”: she is sexually inexperienced but likes sex, has a career but is a full-time homemaker, has a slim build, is athletic, and has pretty eyes, dark hair, good complexion and a firm butt. Large breasts are nice, but not all that important. The study’s lead author, Erica Gannon, says the specifications are similar to what is found in the Bible. “Our participants, whether knowingly or unknowingly, espouse a view of the ideal woman that is very similar to the views held by individuals thousands of years ago.” However, she adds, “It’s hard to be this woman.” (UPI) ...About as hard as being the ideal man: strong yet gentle, powerful yet sensitive, has a great career yet helps clean the house and raise the children, in control yet cries, and a sex expert who’s only been with one woman.

Suicide is Painless
When Douglas Alan Smith, 34, was convicted of murder in Arizona, he ordered his lawyer to seek the death penalty for him, saying he would rather die than spend the rest of his life in prison. “It took me a long time to get OK with it,” said his lawyer, Jamie McAlister. But she realized there was something worse than the death penalty: “What I hate more is to see someone strip people of their right to make their own decisions.” However, the Phoenix, Ariz., murderer was denied his wish and instead sentenced to 62 years in prison. McAlister will appeal the sentence and insist that her client be put to death. (AP)

Position Available, Some Experience Preferred
British au pair Louise Woodward, who was convicted of manslaughter in the death of an American infant in her charge, says that she has received 50 marriage proposals, mostly sent in letters, since returning to England. “You always get people who see a picture or your face on TV and fall in love with it,” she told reporters. “They tend to keep my photograph by their bed.” The former nanny says none of the letters were “scary” even though some came from “loonies”. Rather, “I’ve got lots of friends out there,” she said. (AP)

Join the Navy, See the World
A lot of people seem to want to join the British Royal Navy. However, “we are getting young people who are very bad swimmers or in some cases can’t swim at all,” says Capt. Chris Tuffley, the Navy’s director of physical training. “Some are literally scared of the water.” The Navy told the government of the problem, and recommended better swimming facilities in schools. But the Education Department has rejected the suggestion: it says that standards are already in place which require all 11-year-olds be able to swim 25 meters. (Reuters)

Oral Contracts aren’t Worth the Paper they’re Written On
Peter Wallis, 36, says he and his ex-girlfriend had an “oral contract” that she would take birth control pills. However, he says, she intentionally stopped taking them and became pregnant. So the Santa Fe, N.M., man is suing Kellie Smith, 37, charging fraud, breach of contract, and conversion of property — his sperm. Smith’s lawyer has asked the judge to dismiss the lawsuit on the grounds that it is “ridiculous”. (Reuters)

When We Ask, Please Tell
While the U.S. military is still drumming out any homosexuals it finds in its ranks, the Dutch air force is actively recruiting them. “There are more exciting places on earth than the dark room,” promises the caption under a photo of a F16 fighter plane in an ad in GAY Krant, a leading gay magazine in Holland. The “dark room” refers to back rooms in gay bars where men meet. (Reuters)

Dream Job
Rock Hall, Md., Police Chief Kevin Winstead told one of his officers about a dream he had about watching a building burn down. When the story reached the town council, they took it as a “veiled threat” and fired him. Winstead is now suing the town over his firing and damaged reputation. (AP)

Equal Opportunity
Police in London, England, have reportedly “rescued” a man who says he was forced by “two stunning blondes” to take Viagra. The women, he said, then chained him to a bed in a hotel and raped him. He was found the next morning still in chains, and a sign reading “Viagra Rape Squad Strikes Again” posted on his door. However, police noted, the man did not press criminal charges against the women. (AFP)

Proof of Concept
Kevin Sean Rowe, 34, thought it would be fun to squish a quarter on the tracks of an oncoming train. The Fort Lauderdale, Fla., writer walked onto the tracks, put the coin down and waited for the southbound train to run it over. “I was very much aware of the first train,” he said. “I was utterly oblivious to the second one.” Rowe was standing on the northbound track, his back to another train coming the other way. The collision left him with a fractured skull, broken ribs and a collapsed lung, but he will recover. (Reuters)